May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
