IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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