my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
