Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
