She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize