did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
barbara walters just said penis...
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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