Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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