I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Acid is not a monday night drug
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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