I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
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