Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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