Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
