The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
