bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
