Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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