white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize