I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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