Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize