I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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