This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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