how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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