I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
