Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize