Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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