Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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