I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
