Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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