I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
