she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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