wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize