No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
