Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
