so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I just blew my weed a kiss
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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