I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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