areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
