whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
