Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
