is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
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