found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
