I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize