if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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