i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize