oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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