Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
