party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Randomize