What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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