Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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