so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize