It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
