We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
