Already got asked if we're dating
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
