dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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