Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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