im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
